As of yesterday, I was officially 18 weeks pregnant. I'm finding this pregnancy to be a struggle with body image, but I'm also continually reminding myself of this little miracle growing away inside me. I'm at a heavier weight than I was with either of my other two at this point (at least I think so), and of course I stress about losing the weight after baby is here. But I also need to keep in mind that I never really "recovered" from the hypothalamic amenorrhea, and will need to make sure I don't over exercise and eat enough once baby does come. Granted, eating ice cream every night certainly isn't helping my weight. :)
Last night I just laid in bed with my hand on my belly praying over this sweet babe, that he or she would come to know Jesus, and that the anatomy scan in two weeks will go well. After much convincing from a few friends, we decided to not find out the gender. It's our chance- we have all the clothes and we're not having any more babies after this. Everyone who has waited keeps talking about how special that moment is when baby is born. Bring on the surprise!
We've had Holden a couple of days a week over the last few weeks, and he has been such a good baby! I feel like he fits right in to our crazy, and I'm extra thankful I'm pregnant, because Holden makes me want another baby right now! He's come to pre-k dropoff/pickup and ballet class, he's been napping like a champ, and he really only seems to cry when he's tired or hungry. So very different from Jonah, and I'm praying that Holden is teaching the one in my belly his good, easy-going baby ways. :)
|a bump and a baby|
We had some friends over yesterday morning for a play date, and that's the first time in awhile I've had any one over. It was SO good to catch up with my friend, and watch our kids play and fight (ha!) I know that compared to a quite a few of my friends, my house is not the cleanest, but I'm resisting the urge to feel like my house has to be perfect in order for anyone to come over. The bathroom wasn't even freshly cleaned yesterday (sorry, Natalie!), so hopefully that's a step in the right direction. Just keeping it real, and sharing life honestly.